Disappearing Act

Sorry I've been so absent lately... I've been INCREDIBLY busy!!!

I don't think I've mentioned before, but I"m directing Godspell for the crew for Good Friday. It's been a huge task, but things are going great. I couldn't ask for a better cast... they are so talented and so excited and enthusiastic... it's totally humbling for me. Amazing how a small idea could transform into something that is so much fun, though a TON of work. I'm floored by these people who have stepped into the roles and just take it on full force... who knew the crew was so talented?

I've gotten a little flustered by some criticism we've been hit with, and some negative words, but I think Godspell could really bring Jesus to life for some people, so we push on and hold our heads high. Just hoping I don't lose any more of my cast at this point. It'd be a huge hit without each of them, who add so much to this project individually and as a great ensemble. I feel so blessed by these people and look forward to each rehearsal. 4 weeks to put on a show is quite a task, but I think we'll do great! :)

On top of that, my job is just a huge energy sucker. It's going well, minus tifts with a co-worker on a daily basis, which I'm trying to push through with integrity and without freaking out on them. I just find myself totally worn down at the end of the week. Probably mostly because all of my spare time is divided between Godspell, youth group, ship events, and the ward when I can get down there, not to mention sleep.

Sleep has been a big issues lately though. I think the major part is caffeine intake. I've been watching that a bit... also the book I'm reading just took an intense turn which has been taking over my dreams a bit. Sleep has not come easy, and when it does, the dreams are insane, but I'll take what I can get. Without sleep, man am I an ugly person... I try my best, but it's pretty rough. Yesterday, I was just delirious by the middle of the work day. Thankfully I was able to go out and play Frisbee and go to dinner for a friend's birthday with energy.

Anyway... I'm realizing that this post is starting to sound delirious...:) I slept in today, and I've been working on my budget for the last 2.5 hours, so my brain is fried. Hopefully the rest of the day will be nice and chill: )

I just wanted to let you guys know what's been up with me and that after Easter, I"ll be working back in Reception again for a short time, so hopefully you'll get lots of posts from me coming shortly;)

<3 M

Happy Birthday to Me!!

My birthday was an extreme mish-mash of different emotions, reactions and feelings....

I woke up, excited to see what my door looked like, maybe even score some sweet cookies. So, I wandered out still sleepy-eyed and dragging my feet behind. I opened the door.... and... there was NOTHING on the door... my heart sank. Last year, someone had decorated the door, put cards on the door etc. I thought about it and it only made me feel worse that it's in general the job of one of the 'good' friends to do that... I dont have any of those here at the moment.... Not to say my friends aren't good... but I"m just not close enough with anyone that everyone assumed someone else would do it. My mom wanted to do it, but we realized later that she'd given me the decorations to use another time, and now they were in my room.... I didn't much feel like doing it myself, so I left it and headed to work.

I got to work and saw that I was on Waffles in the morning and on Coffee in the afternoon- a marriage of 2 great jobs. I was excited. We got making batter. I made 6 batches this time because the last time, we made 5.5 and had to make more because we were running out, plus the kids had a day off, so I knew we'd have more people coming through... Now, we only have 2 waffle irons and each has 2 spots for a Belgian waffle, which is bigger than the small ones at home. Each batch takes between 3-4 minutes to cook and be ready to go... and we normally sell at least 50... think about that for a minute..

I went to test the heat of the machine... someone had turned the heat to 0...great start... Glad I caught that. We waited about 20 minutes, and finally it seemed ready to go. I poured batter and we were off!! THEN, one of my co-workers came by to take a look... and opened it.... NOOOOOO!!!!! What happens then is the batter clings to the iron for dear life and does NOT want to come off, even though we've oiled the surface.... we began the scraping and scraping and scraping... the part you lift was fine since we had gravity to work with, but the bottom part didn't have anything to help it come out so we had to get creative. THEN, another co-worker saw there was batter cooking on the other side, and decided to have a look... and opened it.... I just about screamed at him... the SAME thing happened, but this time I was smart enough to close the lid for a bit and let it cook more before trying to do it again... In the end,all of the bits were charred, and we scraped them off and poured batter in, letting it cook, and it pulled pieces out with it.... it wound up doing that the whole time, but alas- better to have some specks in your waffle than to have no waffle at all, right?

I was so frustrated by this, I was almost in tears, and the co-worker who blamed it all on me was NOT helping- not to mention they were one of the people who opened it and caused the issues. THen he kept claiming it was the machine's fault, when really it was his... Anyway... near the end, once we were wrapping up, I made myself a waffle, and left it for a moment to talk to my mom. The same guy took said waffle and started eating it... my birthday waffle that I'd made for ME... I got upset becuase it was just 1 thing on top of the next- the waffles werent working on the day I was responsible, making crew angry with us, making me angry with myself, my co-worker blaming me for the whole thing, knowing my mom was going to be leaving in a few short hours, and that I dont have any close friends on the ship to decorate my door... it all built up until I just had to go and walk away for a while and just try to get a grip of my emotions.... I wasn't about to let this guy see me upset... it's what he aims for most days... he likes me to get mad...

The whole day was just feeling like impending doom... I have another coworker who is super awesome and thoughtful... she was supposed to get off of work at 3:30, but came asking me if I'd like to get off at 3:30 so I could spend time with my mom. I was really thankful for this- I was able to help her get everything together and upstairs, hang out with her, make a card for a patient, hang out with other friends who were also leaving and just send her off.

Honestly, it was a tough day in general- mainly because of the goodbyes. Yes- my mom certainly but also my friend Tina, Michelle, Ann and a bunch of others..... Can i just say how lonely it gets when you're always the one being left? Its terrible...

I was sure to plan something right after, so after I said bye to my mom, which was a bit better than the last time, I ran, threw some nice clothes on after a few tears, and we went out to eat. We went to a french Restaurant called Cote de Jardin and it was FANTASTIC! I had Lobster Gratain and Creme brulee with a little bit of wine, was surrounded by the people I call my friends on board- it was a nice mixed group and I was even able to include one of my newest friends in the mix, which was a lot of fun. After dinner, laughs and just talkin about life, we came back and 3 of us played Dutch Blitz.... one of my favorites:)

All in all, it was a rough start, but a great day! There were even a few surprises- like a girl who I find quite lovely(....yes..she's a brit;)) gave me a card with her favorite recipes for baking in it because in the little time we've talked she's discovered my love for baking. How sweet is that?!?!?!

:)