Day 8: Itunes U and Day 9: Taebo

The internet is a HORROR at night, so I'm trying something new... I”m going to write my blessings in the morning now, but in order to do that there might be a short time of clustering them... be patient- I haven't lost count...;)

 

Day  #8: Itunes U

One of my greatest blessings as of late has been Itunes U. Many of you don't know what that is, so let me explain... Itunes U gives the option to download University course lectures as well as published journals read aloud onto your I-device. So far I've gotten to listen to lots of 4 minute stories about children in the health care system- some happy some tragic and I've gotten to listen to the beginning of a seminary school course on Ruth, who I have always been fascinated by and wanted to learn more from.... The best universities have lectures on here... it's a HUGE blessing to me because I LOVE learning.. I LOVE it... I've even found courses I wanted to take and now I get a glimpse at the course to see if I want to actually take it when I get home.... AMAZING.

If you have an I-device..I HIGHLY  recommend this app... especially if you have lots of gigs and a good internet speed.... my internet is poorly, but if I let it sit overnight, sometimes it starts to work....;)  Check it out- it's a HUGE blessing to this girl who LOVES learning both about my career and the bible:)

Day #9: Taebo

Taebo has always been something that I love... like really.. I don't know why.... maybe it's the idea that I can pretend punch something and get exercise out of it, or that it doesnt make me want to collapse at the thought of it(though after today I may've changed my mind). Either way, Billy Blanks has become a friend and his loyal assistant Shelly has become a friend as well.. they're whipping me into shape.

This evening, I went up to set up our wednesday workout, since my partner in exercise was sick. I decided we'd start with a Zumba warmup, hit the Taebo dvd then cool down with Zumba. Little did I realize that when it says 'Taebo Express' and '10 minute segments' that they didn't mean you're supposed to do some of the segments together, but it's your way out of a 30 minute workout if you don't have time for one... which really.. who can't spare 30 minutes in their day to take care of their body.. come on. But anyway... I got going and was doing well... then Billy started getting to me. I had some people watching tonight- a deep conversation happening behind me as I lept into the air, punched and did knee-ups- but nobody came to play tonight- it was just me and Billy- probably better that way... So this first one I did was punch and knee- the punch part I dug, the knee part... OH MY GOODNESS... Killer. So I did that and wanted to give up, but wanted to know what 'combo express' was, as I knew 'boot camp power' was not for today after that workout, 'fast footwork' didn't sound fun, 'kick express' sounds good but not then, etc etc as I went down the list... Combo express seemed to be the only one my mind and body liked. So I popped it in and THANKFULLY it was much easier- less repetition of the same thing over and over and more combinations- I like those:)Afterward I did my cool down, which was super great and then put all of the chairs back...

Now, since there are limited spaces on this lovely floating home of mine, we book out the International Lounge on Mondays and Wednesdays for these exercise classes. We range from 1-sometimes 20 participants on any given night- you never know who you're going to get. Tricky bit is that we have lots and lots of chairs in this room. It's the only room on the ship meant for all of the crew to fit in at once- with about 400 something chairs and standing room. So we clear out a section each time- this time on my own, and put them back as neatly as we can. Thankfully, housekeeping is wonderful and straightens them out after we've butchered it all week. There's an art to putting these chairs back. If you stack them a certain way, all you have to do is pull a bunch off and take one at a time off as you go... you have to see it to know what I mean. New crew are always like 'wow... you really know how to do this, huh'. To that I snicker and say, 'I've only been here 2 years' or …. 'I've only been here FOREVER!' :

International Lounge at the 2011 Film Festival

Today, however, this time alone... well alone minus my friends having their conversation in the back, was much needed. In the middle of the day, I wrote down 'I just want to be alone'... guess what I got... alone time.. well... Billy time, but still.. it was kinda perfect and just what I needed. I didn't want to talk(may come as a shock to many), I didn't want to do anything but be alone and do something- there was my chance and my blessing of the day.

THANKS MOM for getting me the DVDS... I LOOVE Taebo... I may've said this once before, but I love it soo much. I think it originates from 7^th grade when I wanted to get into some shape and tried it out and kinda liked it, but then my FAVORITE teacher of the 7^th grade- Miss. Rainey started teaching kickboxing classes after school- just like Taebo- I was so excited and signed up and gave it my all...  and now I still love it... those middle school teachers sure did make an impact on me come to think of it... all stories for another day;)

Day 7: The Island

Now for the post I wanted to write on Saturday, but didn't get to due to what turned out to be exhaustion(from the sun, lots of exercise, etc.)

I feel SO blessed to have a place of escape from time to time here in Guinea. As much as I've tried to resist, Guinea has swept me away- the people, the scenery- incredible. My heart is here right now.

This is how you get to the island(well..on this kind of boat packed with Mercy Shippers:

It can be very hit or miss with me, but this time I was having fun doodling and enjoying the space, as our particular boat only had a few people on it and there was lots of room to spread out... my stomach churned a little bit, but what's new:)

When we got there, my friend Kelly brought out the paddle boards... I'd never heard of them before but was thrilled to try them out with her. Thankfully the island has a calm side and a rough side... we stuck to the calm side since I'm terrified of waves. Here's what my adventure on the boards looked like....


And so the adventure began....

David helping me get out

It took a while for me to get on my knees, but I did(I'm the one on the left).

 Clearly, I was determined

 

First attempt up

I'm Up....

And crash...

Trying again with less help

Boom

Getting back on/resting for a minute

Decided to go on my knees for a while, so I could get a handle on steering/rowing

Eventually Kelly switched out to give Ryan a turn... this is me from afar attempting to get up again(on the left).

I'M DOING IT!!!!

FIERCE!!!

Afterwards, Kelly and Ryan decided to take a bit of an excursion, so I met these lovely people who peeled me a grapefruit. Essentially, the colored part of the rind is peeled off, leaving the pith/the white stuff there... you cut a hole in the top and squeeze the juice(and the bounty of seeds) out. Once you've juiced it to your liking, you flip it inside out and eat the insides.... amazing... I think I'll do that at home if I can... but the peels to grapefruits here are about 1/2 inch thick...;)

After they got back, We headed to the rougher side of the island, where they paddle boarded the waves(oh no- you would NEVER get me out there doing that...), so I set up a hammock my friend let me borrow for the day, was forced to buy a coke(which I couldn't drink) to set up there, a great guy helped me get the hammock set up(takes a lot of weird knots for the- who knew!), and gave him the coke as a thank you.

After a while, I headed over to see about lunch- I'd ordered shrimp. Then we waited... and waited... it was 2:15 and the boat leaves at 3, so I decided to go back to my area(probably 1/4 mile away), pack my things up and bring them over so that once the food was here we could eat and go..... and we waited.... around 2:40 the guy finally showed up.... we chowed down like nobody's business. My friends got a fish with plantains and I got shrimp and fries, so naturally we all dug in... with our hands mostly... and enjoyed eachother's food:) Amazing fish... the shimp were... hm.. my mom makes better- I mean they were just out of the ocean- can't beat that, but fish straight out of the ocean is way better...:)

We took our hour-long boat ride back and when we got back, I took what felt like the best shower of my life after being in sand for 7 hours. And I just relaxed. However, later that night I got really exhausted- literally- nearly passing out and about to vomit, but once I layed down, I was good to go and slept a long night(where I then posted that blog). Totally worth it for the amazing day:)

Day 6: The Story

This song, The Story by Brandi Carlile, is one that has struck me as an amazingly beautiful, but cutting song. This morning I turned it on, as I was in a melancholy mood, but realized this is my blessing. For so long, I moped around saying 'I have nobody... I wish I had someone to share this song with'.... Then this morning it donned on me... I DO.... This is totally perfect- Jesus and I are this way- he knows everything about me- every scar, every line on my face, he knows my thoughts without me speaking them, and I was made to SERVE him... how incredible does that make this song... pretty amazing.. This picture fits perfectly too..

All of these lines across my face

Tell you the story of who I am

So many stories of where I've been

And how I got to where I am

But these stories don't mean anything

When you've got no one to tell them to

It's true...I was made for you

I climbed across the mountain tops

Swam all across the ocean blue

I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules

But baby I broke them all for you

Because even when I was flat broke

You made me feel like a million bucks

You do

I was made for you

You see the smile that's on my mouth

It's hiding the words that don't come out

And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed

They don't know my head is a mess

No, they don't know who I really am

And they don't know what 

I've been through like you do

And I was made for you...

All of these lines across my face

Tell you the story of who I am

So many stories of where I've been

And how I got to where I am

But these stories don't mean anything

When you've got no one to tell them to

It's true...I was made for you

Day 5: Beds and Sunsets

As I lay here feeling not so good all of my plans for this blog go out of the window. But this picture says it all... Also I'm thankful for a safe place to sleep and a mostly comfortable bed to sleep in.

Pray an extra prayer tomorrow for peace for Guinea.

Day 4: Lazare's Orphanage(sorry it's late- internet went weird last night when I tried.

Let me preface this by saying that each time I go to this place, I am blessed by it, so you may see this one come up a few times, however, each time I'll hone in on what blessed me THAT day...

Today I struggled to wake up- this hasn't happened in some time, so that frustrated me, putting me in a hurry to get ready to go to Lazare's this morning.

Now, let me explain in a very small nutshell what Lazare's is... it's an orphange/care center. Some of the parents have parents who simply can't take care of them, some abandoned for various reasons, and some have lost their parents. About 1/2 of these sweet ones have HIV and their ages range from about 2 months(that's one of the caretaker's babies though) to 13. This has become my heart and home in Guinea.

So, I got up and got ready quickly, and we were off- doing my usual call to Ansuman- our incredible translator and someone who is quickly becoming a friend of mine- to be sure he'll be waiting at the gas station near his home for us to get him to take him along in our land rover.

We arrived and today I was the one who got to knock. I knocked on this huge metal gate and it just echoes... it's kinda fun:) The door pulled open by one of the workers and to see the smiles on those children's faces as I walked in... how can that NOT bless you? They rush you with hugs and joy- especially those who they know(I've gone at least 2 times each month since we've gotten here and most recently weekly- it's become my hi-light of the week).

This time I came on in, my little man- Moise, who has become very attached to me, found me within a minute. I worry for his attachment to me sometimes, so I've begun to pull myself away from me. He knows he has a safe and comfortable place to sleep and feel safe and loved with me, but I also want him playing and learning while we're there. When he's only with me, he is grumpy Gus, but when he's playing his little face shines- it lights up and just shines and shines. After a bit, I separated myself from him and went to the kitchen to help cook- it's become something I love to do, as I love cooking but more-so I want to love on these caretakers who are so easily forgotten. Then was our usual story then play time.

Now, I have weeks I come home from Lazare's with energy and excitement, and times I come home with my heart in shreds trying to understand how if God loved his children so much, these children were in such bad shape. Today... I left wondering what God's got planned for me. One of the aunties looked at me and said 'you're trying to learn it all.. you're becoming African..' And I can't help but think that there's a reason I feel this sudden urge to learn Susu, french, how to cook, how to tie babies to my back. It could be that it's because i"m leaving soon, or it could be because I may very well be back in Africa in the future. The ship- maybe, maybe not, but Africa- definitely.

The greatest of all of my blessings today was seeing those children. When we came, so many were just in such bad shape- many new to the center. No life in their eyes, no smiles, no interaction, some would just lay there, or cry all of the time with no consolation. Week by week, I've seen little sparks ignite in some of these sweet babies. It's beautiful.

Me and Joseph the week we found he had gained weight!!!

Joseph is older than he looks and until very recently could not sit up on his own. A few weeks ago, I held him and massaged his back as he layed on his tummy.... now... that's when I realized something was wrong. Turns out little man has scoliosis. He has a full mouth full of teeth, but can't sit up, or walk, and hardly had any life in him. When I first held him I thought he was a 6 month old at the most- so light, bumps all over his skin, feverish- a wreck. A few weeks ago, there was a sudden change. I picked him up and he was heavy .... like... HEAVY.... and I rejoiced- nearly in tears for his gaining weight! Then I realized he was interacting more... last week he started shaking his head super fast, I got a smile and a laugh, I got him interacting with me... something that NEVER could've happened a few weeks ago... I nearly bursted into tears.... The ship has agreed to do PT on him to help with his scoliosis so he can grow up mostly normal and boy has it changed him!!! My friend came to me before we left today saying 'Joseph can sit up on his own.' I JUMPED for joy!!! :)

Then there's sweet Esther. I don't know her whole story but a few weeks ago she got VERY sick with an infection that was wreaking havoc on her skin and eating away at it.... she used to be a clingy and protective child, but when she got sick she was even more so.... clearly in pain all of the time and only wanted attention from very few- agony was written all over her face. Today, I saw her carrying a wagon full of toys behind her as she walked and smiled..... and of course, I couldn't help but get this HUGE smile on my face and tell everyone about it....

These are the moments I know God has brought us here not just for a fun missions trip- but for a reason- to further his Kingdom- to love those who have been forgotten.

Earlier I put my little man Moise down for his nap and I heard crying and crying and crying. Went to find out what was going on and one of the little ones- maybe 2 years old- was in the middle of the floor just crying. She saw me and ran straight for me and jumped into my arms. I still couldn't get her to stop making sounds of fear.... so I sang to her.... I realized she felt like nobody could hear her- can you imagine at 2 years old how that must feel.

Now, let me make something VERY clear. The Aunties at Lazare's are INCREDIBLE women of God who are doing their best to make this place run smoothly. But, think about this- maybe 8 total aunties to 27 children... do that math.... most of the kids under age 3... Pray for them please... they need help- they especially need men to come and be role models for these boys(our oldest kids are all boys) and show them love despite the clear rejection they've had by their own families. Pray for the aunties to have energy and for more to come their way to help out in any possible way. Also, pray for sweet Mariatu- a 2 year old who badly broke her leg and almost lost it due to lack of medical care available  thankfully someone was willin to help her and save her leg, but pray that the healing would go quickly- she's in a full cast(up to her ribs) and can't sit up or move much- pray that the healing would come quickly and with little issue. Thank GOD he used the right people and we were able to save her leg!!!! 

Day 3: James

My greatest blessing in my life over the past week is this:

This is the newest addition to our family-my nephew James. He had a bit of a rough go being 6 weeks early, but he's already blessed me SOOOOOO much... just look at him!!:) Truly- he's a miracle and a blessing to each and every one of our family members and beyond... he's also named after my current favorite book of the bible... ;)

Short and sweet today- not feeling much like writing, but this picture speaks louder than any words I could give.

Blessing number 2: Honesty

Really the only thing that comes to mind right off the bat without any force today is simply- honesty.

I've been dealing with lots of different trials lately related to all aspects of life. During it, I've really had a hard time... trying to figure out why those things have been happening to me, going to friends moaning and groaning all about my problems and seeking counsel from THEM.

Here's where the honesty part comes... I had been struggling with a situation and I had prayed and prayed and prayed about it and thought it was going to end up just the way I had hoped- a few nice words, a hug and we'd be back on track. What happened in real life however, was much more startling. My friend was honest... BRUTALLY honest with me... All of my hopes of a great conversation dashed and I cried for literally 1/2 of the conversation. Anyone who knows me knows that's  a big deal- unless watching a movie, I don't cry for ANYTHING unless it's serious...

You may be asking yourselves, 'Michelle....um... then how was that a blessing....'. Whenever people are honest with me, I take a punch, but I come back stronger. Sometimes I have to take multiple punches to the same area of my life before I decide to come back and fight stronger- this certain situation was one of those moments... a life-long battle I've had within me was being addressed right to my face, but my friend, my dear friend was HONEST with me.

I'll admit, after the conversation, I was struggling... I cried for at least an hour, I prayed, I got angry, I stomped on the floor... But then I realized, 'Michelle... this is your chance for change... do it'. God's so good, right? I ended up resting in him for a while and listening.... I started realizing this was not going to end me, I didn't need to run and tell anyone about it- it was for me and him and my friend to have- nobody else and it was going to be a hard adjustment, but a change is in progress for the better because that friend was hoest with me... and God had wrapped his huge arms around me and gave me peace and comfort by the end of the day that surpasses anything any human could've given me.

Honesty has always been reallllly hard for me to swallow.... it's like putting the worst medicine in my mouth and forcing me to swallow- reminds me of a story actually...

When was little, I had to be on an antibiotic for something or other- I was always taking something between my ears, my lungs and the rest of me. But this time I was really little... Normally I had some Hawiian Punch(anyone else miss that stuff?) to mask the taste and I could pretty much get it down, but we had run out...My mom and dad had the plan down.. one at my head to hold my head still and restrain me, one at the feet. They tried and tried and wasted I don't even know how much medicine on me spitting it out. There's the method of holding the mouth and nose shut, which I'm pretty sure is what happened during this, but I REFUSED to swallow the stuff- it tasted like poison... so I threw up all over the place...after that moment, my mom told the doctors I was allergic to it- not because I was, but because we didn't want to go through that again... we claimed this for quite some time:)

That's how hard honesty can be for me to swallow.

However, honesty has always been the one thing to bring a relationship closer and more true. the only way I've been able to stay friends with certain people in my life is their brutal honesty and their willingness to do so- and recieve it as well. There's a huge difference between being brutally honest and giving truth with love though.... when truth is given in love for the other person, good always comes from it. Sometimes it SUCKS to hear that certain aspects of your personality make people want to not be around you, or you are too much this or that when all you're trying to be is yourself... but... God really works through those honest moments.

For the record- things were miscommunicated a little in that conversation between us, but the after-effect is still tough to take... but God's teaching me- 'don't put all your eggs in a basket and really you should come to me first, not them anyway- they are imperfect humans....they will let you down'... you'd think I'd know this by now... time after time is happens, but hey- God loves to use these moments and turn them into BLESSINGS... though they may be in disguise for a little while;) 

I'll end with a quote...

" He is the same yesterday, today and forever, and his unchanging and unfailing love stustains me when nothing and no one else can." -Bill Bright